Mydentity.

So, this past week I've been thinking a lot about identity. In being in another culture, in myself, in people in general, and ultimately in God. There have been several different instances through this past week that have brought my thoughts back to the base of humanity: identity. Please bear with me as I type out these thoughts.

At the beginning of this week, if not the end of last week, I was walking with Josh as he was showing me how to navigate the streets towards the local bank and how to withdraw soles (the local currency). As we were walking, the subject kind of entered into the conversation unintentionally through just talking about life that Josh and Liz have experienced while in Perú. "These sunglasses, this shirt, or my shoes don't make me any greater than anybody else. It just means that God has blessed me with more, outside of my own doing, and has given me more to steward." I don't know about you, but this hits home. Just like how that subject unintentionally entered into the conversation, thoughts opposing Josh's statement unintentionally enter into my mind. I don't ever consciously think, "Man, I am so much greater than these people because I have this or that", but so often do I unintentionally act or feel that way. That I have more things, so I am worth more, or something like that. Since then, I have been challenged to get outside of my previous mindset of feeling more important and ultimately finding some significant piece of my identity in my worth or belongings. Matthew 6:19-21 says, "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Upon reflecting upon this passage and those words spoken by Josh, I have been very convicted in seeing a good portion of my worth and identity unintentionally found in treasures of this world. If items, 'treasures', superiority, etc., are the basis of what I am considering the most then how will I be able to minister and witness to the most essential, important aspect of anyone's identity: their souls.

Which leads to identity in myself. By the way, I'm just going to be candid in all of these blog things. So I'm sorry if they're too introspective, personal, negative, or happy. Ok. So, since hearing that truth and pondering it, I've been convicted within myself of just feeling that superiority towards others within the Perú and within America, too. Again, I don't walk down the streets and constantly think, "Because I have more worldly possessions, or because I'm American, I am worth more than you." But I also don't think, "How can I pray for and care for the souls of these people?" My identity is generally so internalized and materialized that I don't have the Gospel-minded focus on other's souls, nor my own. If I focus on material poverty of others, as a result of focusing on the material possessions of myself, then I am avoiding what lies underneath. The heart of the issue. One's relation with God. If I pray for materiality, health, solid relationships, and even safety--however good these things can be--for people, myself included, then I am escaping literally the most vital part of life: faith in Christ. Matthew 6:19-21 doesn't say, "Store up money, friends, health/home/car insurance, and safety, for those who have these will enter the Kingdom of Heaven." It says that those are treasures of earth, that moth and rust destroy, that fade and only last those few years that you live on earth. So if I am focusing on those trivialities of this world, then I am not focusing on the only means of salvation: belief in the one true Savior. I think this is 100% true of me: What I think most important about myself is what I will think most important about others. And then most likely act and pray towards that end. When we enter into a relationship with God, we are not promised health, safety, wealth, or many friends. The Bible actually says, yes this is coming from the Christian Bible, "Then they will deliver you to tribulation, and will kill you, and you will be hated by all nations because of My name. At that time many will fall away and will betray one another and hate one another... But the one who endures to the end, he will be saved." (Matthew 24:9, 10, 13) Anything outside of what God says I will have (tribulation, hatred, death) are simply blessings that I have been given to steward for the short time that I have on earth or for as long as God sees fit to bless me with. They are not, and can not, be my identity.

In interacting with strangers on the street, the boys in Hogar San José, church members, friends at home, anyone, I can not treat them as though their identity is found in material possessions. If I show them mercy, love, kindness, patience, because they have little possessions and not because they are souls longing for God, then what's the point? What is my motivation for doing work while in Perú and while on this earth? Though caring for people's current state is ONE way of showing Jesus to them, it should not be THE only way. I should desire, and am praying that God will allow me, to care for the souls and faith in Jesus within those with whom I interact. If I treat the boys in Hogar San José as only orphans, then I may well avoid treating them as Sons whom God is calling out of darkness. If I treat a homeless women on the street as such because of her material poverty, then I may avoid telling her of the riches that are found in Christ. If I treat friends at home as only buddies, then I may avoid telling and showing them of the brotherhood that is found in Christ. If I treat people in general, and myself, by the standards set by this world of what it means to be "important," then I am avoiding the the TRUE importance of belief, faith, and repentance found in Christ.

So why do I do this? Why do I treat people as such, highlighting false identities that are impressed by this world? Because I am a sinner. Yes, I have been saved, redeemed from the Hell I deserve by the grace of God alone, but I am still sinning. Currently sinning. Minutely.

Upon another conversation with Josh and Liz, this was discussed. "In doing missions, (missionaries) are not up here *hand high in the air* and the rest down here *hand parallel to chest*. We are right here and everyone else is right here *hands level*." I've thought about it like this before, and have thought about others like this as well. "Man, you're going to another country to do missions! You're going to do great and save so many souls!" YES, if you do spread the Gospel of Christ and assist God in leading others to Himself, then that is AMAZING and a blessing to experience. But because others and myself are serving overseas, and even for those who are serving at home, doesn't mean that we stop sinning and enter into this type of holier state where we are enabled to spread the Gospel more effectively. It is still real life, and sin still happens. But thanks be to God that He forgives us our sins and still sees fit to work through our imperfections. God has been doing that since the cross, and even before.

I am a sinner that is ministering to other sinners. The only, core, essential thing that sets me apart from others is that I believe that Jesus is the Son of God and died for my sins to save me from eternal damnation. And even then, I may be a sinner who is ministering to other sinners who too have placed their identity in God.

The core of my identity is found in the Lord, whether I realize it or not. So when I realize it, act like it, and pray like it, my view of others' true identities shifts.

We have all done the same amount to save ourselves: nothing. We have all been given the same opportunity to receive grace. And those who have been acted upon by the Holy Spirit and have received this free gift of God have been given the blessing and joy of spreading and multiplying the gift. Preaching to myself, here, too.

Matthew 24:13 says, "This Gospel of the Kingdom shall be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all the nations, and then the end will come." If I, and we, are focusing on 'identities' in this world, then we are slacking in sharing the blessing of the IDENTITY found in Christ. May we preach to people as if their souls are on the line.

Daniel